Wednesday, May 26, 2010

A Bunch of Nonsense

It's 8am. Will is still sleeping, and I have been awake since 7am. We took Will down to the playground last night before bedtime, and it completely wiped him out. We'll have to do that more often. He is very independent, going wherever he pleased. Although I am pretty sure if we just left him, he would have noticed very quickly. He really has little, to no fear at the playground. He climbs everywhere, leans his body way out over the edge, and will go down all the slides with no hesitation. He usually isn't very spooked by other the parents or children around, and really quite enjoys watching them. Last night was different. He was just minding his own business, on his way up to the slide for the umpteenth time, when a bigger 2 year old boy started talking to him. His firsts words were pleasant enough "Hi baby." Will just stood there in silence, completely still. "Baby, be quiet!!!" Still silent. Still frozen. "Stop baby, be quiet!" Will wasn't sure what to do. He really wanted to go down the big slide, but he would have to walk past the boy to get there. He decided it wasn't worth the risk, and turned around to go down the small slide. Turns out it was a good decision. Just a few minutes later he did come in contact with the boy. Will tripped, and the boy tried to sit on him like he was a horse. Daddy came to the rescue then, of course.

Will is starting to stir. Although it would have been nice to sleep a bit longer, I really have enjoyed this cool, quiet house to myself while it lasted. I am very much looking forward to this day. My sister is coming over this afternoon to watch Will, so I can do some casual shopping on my own. Looking for a dress for my brothers upcoming wedding, and hopefully get some new, fun summer clothes that my soon to be growing belly can fit into. Not quite looking forward to driving a car with no ac in 90 degree weather, but I suppose I will survive. As of now, Dean plans on being home relatively early (5pm or so) and we may head up to the beach for a bit. Maybe get some ice cream Yes get some ice cream!

Well, Will is now definitely awake, and pounding away in his crib. Time for me to go. I hope you all have a pleasant day!

Monday, May 17, 2010

Pregnancy Diary: 11 weeks and 3 days

I can't help but laugh after writing out this blog posts title. Before experiencing pregnancy myself, I never understood why when asking a pregnant woman how far along she was she would always respond "Oh, I'm 27 weeks." Um, ok. So (in my head), take 27......and divide that by 4.5....and you get...??? Instead of just saying "I'm 6 months." But I find myself doing just that! You see, when you're pregnant, every week completed is such a milestone! Whether it is one week closer to the end of morning sickness. One week closer to being able to find out the sex of the baby. One week closer to your due date! It's all so exciting! Plus, you feel so much more...accomplished by saying a big number apposed to a smaller one.

Well, where was I. Oh yes, 11 weeks, 3 days. Woohoo! I had my first appointment with my midwife (group) today. Ya know, the one with the whole kit and kaboodle. Fun stuff. It was all worth it though, because at the end we were able to hear the heartbeat!!!! It has to be one of the best sounds ever! Coming close to a tie with hearing your baby's cry for the 1st time. It's amazing how we are able to hear a strong, clear heartbeat from my 2 inch long, 1 oz baby tucked away in my womb.

I went into the appointment telling myself not to get worried if we couldn't find the heartbeat today. We tried at 11 weeks for the first time with Will, and she wasn't able to find it. She (a different midwife then the lovely one who saw me today) immediately goes into talking about ectopic pregnancies and setting up an ultrasound asap to make sure everything was alright. Needless to say, it being my first pregnancy and all, I freaked out! I couldn't sleep that night. Every little cramp I felt scared the bejeeburrs out of me. We ended up being able to go into Compass Care for an ultrasound, and saw that everything was just fine.

Although every due date calculator I've used online has said Dec 3rd, the official due date given to me from my Doc's was Dec. 5th.

I am feeling very grateful today! I have one healthy and happy son. Another precious life growing safe in my womb. A hardworking husband who loves his family. I am feeling so much better now! Plus, I was able to stop at the store, so now I can have my chocolate milk! Life is good.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Pregnancy Diary: Week 10

The End Is Near. Of morning sickness, that is! After almost 3 weeks of feeling nauseous day and night, throwing up all day, every day, horrible headaches, all my energy gone, and having any smell put me over the edge, I am finally starting to remember how it felt to feel normal. This week has been a recovery week for me. Having lost 10lbs in 2 weeks from not being able to keep anything down, I was so weak and nutrient deficient. I couldn't stand up for 30 seconds without becoming lightheaded, dizzy and have my heart start pounding like crazy. I still get dizzy if I am walking around/standing for too long, but my appetite for food is slowly coming back. I am feeling a little stronger every day.

But then there is my kitchen. I used to love my kitchen. Will and I spent the majority of our day in there. Now, it is my enemy. My constant fear. Smells are a big deal for me when I am pregnant. I still can't go in there and not become sick to my stomach. That's just stepping foot in there, lets not even get into having to open the fridge. Oy.

This whole experience has been so emotionally draining too. I have never felt so useless in my life. It's an awful feeling. From the outside it looks like I have it made. Perhaps I do. Someone always there to watch and care for my kid. Feed him, change diapers, entertain him. My house being cleaned and laundry being done for me while I get to sleep in, lay on the couch all day watch movies, and take naps. My whole purpose in life is to be a wife, a mother, and I couldn't fulfill either of those. I love caring for my son. Getting him dressed, changing diapers, preparing healthy food for him, teaching him right from wrong. All of which I had to put in the hands of other people. Not easy to do at all. Will has hardly been here at all for 3 weeks now. He has been going back and forth between grandparents houses and spending time with daddy at his store. It helps that he has been such a good boy.

Then there is my husband. He has been absolutely wonderful. So far beyond anything words could express. He has been completely selfless. On top of being crazy busy with work and dealing with the stress owning your own business brings, he has also had to step into the role of caregiver, housekeeper, cook and daddy mommy. He gets up extra early to bring Will to his grandparent of the day, changes dirty diapers (big deal!), packs up Will's diaper bag remembering even the little things like the binky and socks. He has been working long days, and comes right home to care for me. Does the laundry, dishes, fends for himself for food. I don't know what I'd do without him. I love you so much baby!


So, here I am. 10 weeks pregnant. The worst is over. I am finally getting excited again about this pregnancy. Happy to have been able to have 2 planned pregnancies, and no early "surprises". I have a thing about planning things out. I have my first midwife appointment in a couple weeks, and I can't wait to hear the heartbeat for the first time! I plan on doing a much better job of documenting my growing belly then I did with my first. Don't worry, I won't bore you with a belly pic every week, especially this early on, but I just wanted a starting "before" picture. I'm really not showing at all yet. That little bump is just the stubborn leftovers from baby #1!